SAN FRANCISCO (KRON) — The election may be over but some of the battle lines are still being drawn, and we’re not just talking about the candidates and their parties.
The 2016 election is affecting our personal relationships.
You’ve probably felt it or seen it.
Friends are being “unfriended” on Facebook. There are spats on the BART trains and even in the bedrooms.
Post-election emotions are still running high and not just on the streets.
Households that split their votes are struggling to make peace before the holidays.
Fortunately, there’s help.
Thanksgiving angst.
“Lot’s of relationships are affected by this election more than any we’ve ever seen,” Dr. Brenda Wade said.
So do you keep politics off the table to keep your relationship intact?
“All the experts are saying you know what the advice is….If you and somebody you care about are on different sides of the election, don’t talk about it. Put it in a box and I say – baloney!” Dr. Wade said.
Dr. Wade is a psychologist and relationship counselor and frequent guest on Oprah and Dr. Oz.
Her advice, contrary to popular opinion, don’t ignore it.
“We can’t afford…if you’re in a relationship with somebody you care about,” Dr. Wade said, “what makes the relationship strong is being able to talk.”
Dr. Wade says fear is a toxin on either side of the political divide.
“If your spouse or someone close to you voted for the person you don’t support, and you just can’t reconcile, this is where we have to have that deep, safe honest conversation,” Dr. Wade said. “What fear was triggered? You can’t put it in a box because it’s Thanksgiving. We just don’t want to talk. Create that safe place, and say, ‘Here are the rules. Guys, the rules of engagement are: it’s safe here. Each person gets a specific amount of time.’ You say it and here’s the kicker: at the end of it, you have to turn around and say, ‘We disagree on this, but you’ve shared your feelings.'”
These are sound rules of engagement–on the home front and maybe beyond.
“You know we can only hope that people in Washington will practice compassion, understanding, and forgiveness,” Dr. Wade said.